Tuesday, September 05, 2006

the funniest things

this is my collection, thus far of the funniest things the kids have said. rereading them now makes me enjoy them all the more... and look forward to much more family laughter in the years ahead.

april 2005 (3 years old) - my niece brought over some pumpkin pie for us. the next day i was having lunch with the kids when the doorbell rang. it was the mailman asking me to sign for a letter. my daughter, always the inquisitor, asked if that was the mailman and i said yes, then i took out a piece of pie for dessert and she asked what it was. i told her it was pie. she asked where it came from. i told her someone brought it for me. she then thought for a moment and asked "the mailman?"

may 2005 (3 years old) - when i asked my daughter to identify a picture of a horse she knew what it was. i then pointed to the saddle and asked her what that was. she thought a minute and asked "a seatbelt?"

june 2005 (3 years old) - i was reading with the kids last night and we came to a picture of an elephant with his trunk in a pool of water. my daughter asked what he was doing and i told her he was drinking water, that elephants drink water through their trunks. she came back quickly with "i drink from the fountain!"

july 2005 (3 years old) - my son was upset with something my daughter did and quickly told her "i don't like that, i'm not going to be your sister anymore!"

october 2005 (4 years old) - i took the kids grocery shopping and on the way out the clerk said "bye." so i asked the kids to say goodbye. my daughter said "goodbye" and my son said "don't pee your pants."

october 2005 - my son's pet name for his sister is "pom-pom" because of her hairstyle.

november 2005 - i though i heard my son ask "papa, can i put a bug in my ear?" what he was trying to ask was "can i wear buzz lightyear?"...his light up sneakers.

june 2006 - i'm home with the kids for the weekend, my partner's at work. my son's on the potty and i hear him say to me "papa, i'm done, i wiped my vagina and my bum." which he hears his sister say often. his sister is in a room nearby and tells him quickly "you don't have a vagina!" i tell this story at dinner that night and the four of us can't stop laughing for 5 minutes. (note: we decided early on based on dr. phil's advice to use the anatomically correct names for penis and vagina)

june 2006 - my daughter was singing a song while i was doing her hair, something about "chicken little's alligator underpants." sounds like she and her brother learned it in school, but she and her brother keep changing the words each time they sing it to see who can make each other laugh more.

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